Depression, eating, and fitness.

The last two weeks were very difficult; cutting off a friendship is a huge challenge, especially when that is specifically what one does not wish to do. I had already been fairly depressed and stressed out; the last few weeks were the lowest since I finished up at Smith. My parents visiting actually helped a lot with getting out of that funk, believe it or not. ;)

Unfortunately, while I attempted to turn to exercise (endorphins = happy, right?) that failed, and I turned to ice cream and brownies (hey, I did bake them from scratch at least). I managed to put on only 1.2lbs during this, even though I ate "bad" food and a lot of it.

Today I had my first appointment with my trainer in weeks (he had been in Hawaii on vacation, I'm so jealous). I went and now, of course, I'm utterly sore. But I pushed hard during it and I stayed after and did 30 minutes of Cardio. Normally I separate these activities, but I knew if I wanted to get things going again, I had to forge forward, fast.

I feel better; I still want ice cream - a lot. But I've exercised and that helps me stay disciplined; I hate throwing out that time and energy - it's just so counter-intuitive. So I'll have a healthy dinner tonight, eat a 15 calorie fudgsicle (actually quite delicious) and get some sleep.

Back on track though, eh? I'm doing two appointments a week with my trainer, and I have 12 sessions already paid for. That's weights twice a week with someone to be encouraging, and I am trying to do cardio 6 times a week (preferably 7, but I'm trying to be realistic here). I should do weights three times a week, and I'm going to try, but we'll see. I really, really don't want to set myself up for failure. So, being realistic is important.

.. and somehow, I have to quit being depressed. Fun times ahead!